M Unity

The 3 main reason why New Year’s resolutions don’t work

Few more hours until 2023. Time to start fresh, with a clean slate. Time to reevaluate some of our life’s choices and make plans for a better year ahead.

Many of us spent the holidays over-eating and indulging in everything that this season brought us. Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year – they all include food (and good time).

The Holiday season usually goes hand in hand with gaining some weight and feeling bad about it. Or the opposite mindset: “Let me eat now, I’ll just work out harder ‘next’ time!”

Please don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t indulge or eat as much as you can. Eat your heart out, enjoy the good food and mulled wine (my favorite treat this time of the year).

But if the past taught us anything, that next time usually never comes. 

New Year’s resolutions are the perfect opportunity for all those who have failed to start making the changes that they said they would make the previous year, or the next week, next month, or perhaps when summer (or winter) starts. Does that sound familiar?

Have you ever made new year’s resolutions?

How long were you able to stick to your resolutions?

How long did it take for you to say “I’ll start next week/next month/before summer?”

How can we make this year’s resolutions a success? 

What can we do to stick to our decisions and implement our desired changes?

Ok, let me share the 3 main reasons why New Year’s resolutions don’t work, based on the interviews with my clients’  .

Why do we make New Year’s Resolutions?

Did you know that top 3 New Year’s resolutions are: 

  1. Exercise more and lose weight
  2. Start saving money
  3. Start eating healthy

Why do people make promises to themselves to live better and healthier? 

Well, we all strive to live a happy, healthy and vital life, don’t we? We all want to look and feel good, stress less, enjoy more. Isn’t that fascinating though? We want to live happily ever after, and each year we fall short. 

Our own past, and studies, show us, that  80% of New Year’s resolutions fail before the end of February

Personally, I don’t engage in making New Year’s “resolutions”. I feel there is so much hype and pressure around them. Sometimes I feel like people make them because that’s what they’re supposed to do. What do you think? 

What I prefer to do, I rather evaluate my year on what has gone very well and what has not, in my personal as well as business life. I look back to see what has exceeded my expectations and I express gratitude for every single moment. Then I make decisions with regards to my goals, my focus, finances, relationships, success and health. Then I decide what will move my needle towards my goal, to generate more happiness, abundance and vitality for all of us.

Anything that takes me off that road – even if it seems like an amazing opportunity – I say NO to.

It’s hard sometimes, especially if a lot of monetary (or other) incentives are involved. In these situations I take a step back and have a ‘heart to heart’ talk with myself, or with my coach.

Can you imagine what we could achieve if we all understood the key ingredient to a successful change or a transformation? 

That key being – a deep level of understanding of why we operate the way we do, and recognizing what keeps us locked in specific (often negative), self-sabotaging, or self-limiting behaviors that resist change. 

Only, and only once we understand our mindsets, values, beliefs, fears and habits – only then will we realize why our goals are hard to achieve and more importantly – sustain.

Doesn’t that make you excited about the limitless possibilities for all of us? 

We need to find our WHY and commit to it!

-Marcela

Ok, let’s move on to the 3 main reasons why New Year’s resolutions don’t work.

1. Lacking of a firm decision and commitment

If you are just trying, if you are just dabbling – not committing to your decisions, there is no power engine that will propel you towards your goal. Making a decision means that there is no other outcome except the one you desire. 

If a firm decision isn’t made, you are merely stating a preference.

In the words of Tony Robbins, “the most successful people aren’t necessarily the best and brightest, the fastest and strongest. They’re the ones with the most commitment.”

Dig deep and find your WHY. That ‘why’ will be your engine.

2. Planning to turn your life upside down to achieve change

Truth to be told, we humans fear change. Even a good change can make us feel anxious and stressed. Imagine the pressure and stress we encounter when we try to turn our life around. 

And the mindset of “I’m going to fail anyway, it’s not going to work. It never has!” is not helping either.

Instead of aiming for an extreme make-over, strive to create balance in your life by setting small, attainable goals. Balance isn’t something we should  be afraid of. Balance is natural and that’s exactly what we at M-Unity believe in. Keep it natural. In other words, normal and close to yourself. 

3. Lacking of accountability and support network

Big changes and reaching important goals don’t just happen overnight. They require consistency and massive action that can move us forward towards our goals. Despite the challenges, hardships and pushback. 

We all have our own habitual ways to deal with life. To achieve that consistency and keep taking massive action, we need to come out of our comfort zone. Our limits need to be stretched, we need to be held accountable. Especially after the initial excitement and drive fades and we encounter challenges along the way.

Whether your goal is to be happier, healthier, leaner, stronger, more successful or more mindful –  to achieve those goals requires you to adopt a different mindset than your current one.

And to achieve that – we need outside support. We need a partner, or a support network,  that serves us as a true and honest mirror. The kind of support that makes us see what we can’t (or don’t want to) on our own. 

With the right support, whenever we start feeling like we don’t deserve all those good things in life, or when we want to give up, our support network will lead us back on the road to success. 

BOTTOM LINE

Can you imagine what would happen if this time you would be able to transform? What would your life look like? How would you feel? Can you see it?

Whether you have a list of New Year’s resolutions or not, whether you just want to live a happier and healthier life – make that firm decision, commit to it and engage your support network.

Let’s all work together in building a happier and abundant life for all of us.

I know WE CAN! Do you?